time in a bottle

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

just a little pick me up... this is my absolute favorite song

Sometimes I just don't know what to say. Yeah Shocker I know. I know I talk alot, I'm working on it...But when I talk to God, sometimes His goodness overwhelms me and anything I can think to mutter seems, trivial. But this song, says so much... God is awesome, and I think some ppl don't acknowledge him, bc they can't even begin to comprehend someone who loves us this much! Hope these lyrics bless u....


I know i need you
I need to love you
I love to see you, but its been so long
i long to feel you
i feel this need for you'
and i need to hear you
is that so wrong?

now you pulled me near you
when we're close i fear you
still im afraid to tell you
all that i've done
are you done forgiving?
or can you look pass my pretending?
Lord i'm so tired of defending
what i've become
what have i become?

i hear you say "my love is over,
its underneath, its inside, its in between
the times you doubt me, when you can't feel
the times that you've questioned 'is this for real?'
the times you've broken, the times that you mend
the times you hate me and the times that you bend
well my love is over, its underneath
its inside, its in between,

these times you're healing
and when your heart breaks
the times that you feel like you've fallen from grace
the times you're hurting
the times that you heal
the times you go hungry and *are tempted* to steal
in times of confusion and chaos and pain
im there in your sorrow under the weight of your shame
im there through your heartache
im there in the storm
my love i will keep you by my power alone
i dont care where you've fallen, where you have been
i'll never forsake you
my love never ends, it never ends

give a little, help alot

One thing that God is always teaching me, is that I don't know very much! Lol! He puts these CrAzY ideas in my head, mostly I get them while I'm driving to work, of events and things I can do. But for some reason, I think I don't believe Him. Actually I don't trust ME!!! Probably because I know ME so well.

I get visions of my student doing plays, outreach events, conferences, community events, not just the basic little stuff either, their pretty detailed. I started my resale shop in the fall of 2004 but the idea came to me around 1999. I just kept letting fear and doubt get in the way. It's kinda hard to just jump off into the deep end, you know, but when it comes to owning your own business, I think you've got to do that. Just close your eyes and jump!

Anyways as I was saying God is always teaching me things... As I've gone through the "THEFT" ordeal this summer and over the years as I've struggled with gambling, God has really had ONE BIG message for me.... And it is this: "JILL, TRUST ME, HAVE FAITH IN ME, COME TO ME!!!" And why haven't I heard it? Because, I'm busy trying to make it happen ~ hmphhhh who knew there was an easier road. It was abundantly clear this summer, as money was just literally disappearing and I cried out to God for help, he just showed me... "Jill, I'll take care of you."

My pastor is always saying "You take care of God's Business and he'll take care of yours." What's God's business you may ask? I was praying about it, and this is where I was directed in my bible:

Isaiah 58

6 “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke?
7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe them,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousnessa]">[a] will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

“If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
10 and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday.
11 The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail.
12 Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

These words were like water to my soul.... for so long, I was stuck on ME and MY PROBLEMS and MY HANGUPS.... The devil used the embarrassment from my gambling and other things that came to pass to keep me from working for the good of GOD'S KINGDOM... Don't let that happen to you! And don't be surprised either, bc the times I AM MOST ATTACKED is while I am trying to do good. HAHA, I was even arrested over it in a land far, far away! But God is faithful and he works his miracles in ppl just like u and me. Just keep pressing in, living for GOD, and in the moment of utter despair feeling overburdened and tired, cry out to God and HE WILL ANSWER YOU! He will be your REAR GUARD, haha, JESUS HAS YOUR BACK!

Isn't that pretty darn awesome??? So let's see... when we struggle, when we feel less than holy, worthless, useless, lost, broken, that is the time to see who is in your life, and how you can bless them... with words, simple gestures, giving them a moment alone by watching their kids, praying for them, an extra meal, a financial blessing, a kind smile, "May I pray with you?", a hug, washing their car, cutting their grass... just allow whatever burdens them, to become your burden, and miraculously you will feel your own burden lifted and YOU will SHINE for HIM with HIS GOODNESS as your GUIDE...

PEACE & BLESSINGS FRIENDS... you probably already knew how this worked, I didn't and so God had to take me by the hand and show me... LOL! He's probably like, "WHEW 36 years old and finally, she is getting it!"